Making Every Moment Matter—how Gary was able to enjoy the company of his family, and a whisky in the sunshine.
28th February 2025
< BACK TO NEWSGary Phipps loved whisky, playing golf, and was partial to a visit to Costa Coffee. He retired in 2019 after 28 years working for the council, but took a part time job at Dorset County Hospital because he liked to stay busy. Most of all, he loved his family.
In early 2024, Gary was referred to Weldmar Hospicecare following a diagnosis of mesothelioma. He was visited at home by his Weldmar Community Nurse and an occupational therapist, before being admitted to the Inpatient Unit where he spent his final four days. Gary’s wife, Jenny, their daughters Natalie and Kimberly, and son-in-law Justin, told us more about the care the family received from Weldmar.
JENNY: Gemma, the Weldmar Community Nurse, sorted everything out including Gary’s medication. She worked out exactly what he needed. He wasn’t eating at the time, so she put something in place in bring his appetite back. He went from eating nothing to asking for a slice of toast. He had two, and then asked for two more! She was brilliant in that respect. She was always there for us when we needed her.
KIMBERLY: He had been prescribed pain medication, but was reluctant to take it because he didn’t want to be reliant on it. Gemma gave him the reassurance that it was fine to take, and worked with him on taking just the right amount to manage his pain.
JENNY: He was given a handheld fan by the Weldmar occupational therapist, which really eased his breathlessness. They also helped with cushions for his pressure sores, and a stool he could use in the bathroom to have a wash, so he could do his daily routine himself as much as possible.
NATALIE: He could get up the stairs but would become quite breathless. They taught him to climb one stair at a time with both feet. It meant he wasn’t so breathless when he got to the top. Little things like that really made a difference.
KIMBERLY: Dad was admitted to hospital on Friday, 31st May, and the following Wednesday he came to the hospice. The plan was for him to come home, but we realised there was so much more we could do for him here.
JUSTIN: Straight away, there was a change in him. When I saw him in hospital, he wasn’t happy. As soon as he was here, he was much more relaxed and comfortable. You couldn’t fault a
single person who was looking after him here.
KIMBERLY: Dad hated being in hospital. We could only visit for an hour or two a day, and then it could only be two of us. At the hospice, we could all come. We’ve got a big family!
JENNY: The personal care they gave him was excellent. He would be washed every day. He always liked to be clean shaven, and so they would shave him each morning, which just made him happier.
NATALIE: He loved the garden room (the Retreat). He would spend all day out there.
KIMBERLY: Dad had his bed there, and I had a table with my laptop so I could work. The guest room was available, so we could stay overnight too. That meant a lot, because we didn’t have to leave him. Everyone was so welcoming.
NATALIE: I would visit with Evie, our youngest, who could play with toys outside. The staff were all lovely and nothing was too much trouble. One nurse gave Bella ice cream, and another even brought in a fairy costume for her to wear.
KIMBERLY: Dad was really impressed that the chefs visited him every day. He wasn’t eating a lot, but the food he fancied, he really fancied. They went above and beyond to give him what he wanted. He was having three meals a day and he loved it.
NATALIE: One day, Dad said he wanted a whisky, outside in the sunshine, which he was able to have. Our family would pack out the garden room. Everyone got to come in and see him, with the double doors of the Retreat wide open.
JUSTIN: We all felt a connection that makes you feel safe and happy here; it’s an environment where you feel comfortable. There was a wardrobe in Gary’s room, nice blankets and curtains, and didn’t feel clinical.
KIMBERLY: The lounge is lovely, and we could eat around a dining room table while Dad was having a wash. We knew he wasn’t far away, and we could go back to him afterwards.
JENNY: The doctors were so good, and explained everything to Gary. If there was something they didn’t know, they would find out and come back. The nurses would check on him a number of times a day, and move him to ease his pressure sores, but their patience with him was never ending. It was the best treatment, and the best care.
JUSTIN: Everyone who has given Gary care should feel so proud of themselves, because they did an amazing job. The hospice is like the TARDIS; you don’t realise what goes on inside and all the facilities here. When you’re here, you can be a family. Everything else is taken care of.
NATALIE: You don’t realise how amazing Weldmar is until you actually go through it. Dad had wanted to be at home, but we quickly realised that we couldn’t have given him what he had
at the hospice—it was as if he was supposed to be here.
