Matt’s Story: “Weldmar put a hand on our shoulders and said ‘we’re here for you'”

Meet Matt. This year, he joined Weldmar to become our Trusts and Foundations Fundraiser. Matt says it’s not just a job, it’s a chance to repay Weldmar for the huge kindness shown to his family. And this is why…

When Matt’s mum, Kay, was diagnosed with a rare form of leukaemia, he moved home to Weymouth to become her carer. Matt put his career in law on hold, and took up part time positions in hospitality to work around his mum’s care.

Around Christmas time in 2022, Kay was hospitalised with both Covid and flu. Whilst conducting tests and scans a secondary cancer was discovered, and that’s when Weldmar was introduced to the family. Kay was referred directly into the Inpatient Unit for pain management, and to ascertain the best course of action in her medication.

“Mum was there for five days,” explains Matt. “and we met the lovely doctors and nurses. I thought it would be more clinical than it was, and that she might be in a ward with a number of other people. But when you walk in, you realise it’s actually really nice. The rooms are large and airy, and there are beautiful fresh flowers all around. The gardens and the meadow are just lovely, and it was a delight to find out that we could bring in our beloved spaniels to see her. She could see me playing with the dogs in the gardens from her room.”

Support for Matt as a carer which ‘meant the world’

There was also help for Matt throughout this time from Weldmar’s Carer Support service. “I would speak on the phone to Chloe every few days,” Matt explains. “and it would allow me to get all my frustrations and emotions out. I could refresh and go back to the caring. I didn’t think I needed it, instead relying on a stiff upper lip and the ability to push through. As soon as I accepted the help, it was like a floodgate. All this pressure was off my shoulders, and it meant the world. I could speak to someone who knew exactly what I was going through. I could talk about how mum was changing from this incredibly smart, driven women to someone who was poorly in a bed. I wanted to remember the first version, and she helped me to do that.”

“Chloe was very good about asking about me, and the things I liked. So, next time she would call, she would open with a ‘did you watch the rugby game between Saracens and Chiefs?’ I found myself talking about things I hadn’t spoken about in months, because I was so focused about the job in hand, of caring for mum.”

‘Astounded’ that all the care is provided for free

“When we were first referred to Weldmar, I thought I would need some sort of health insurance in place, or else face a large bill. My jaw dropped when I saw that it was a charity. I was astounded that it was all provided for free. All this care for mum, for me, for my grandmother – the whole family. All that care was given at the cost of a ‘thank you’. Kindness, when we really needed it, when everything was so dark and depressing. Weldmar put a hand on our shoulders and said ‘we’re here for you’. It was incredible.”

Our sincere thanks to Matt for sharing his story. Stories are a powerful way of sharing how Weldmar works and what it does, and the difference that it makes to local families. If you have a personal experience of Weldmar that you would like to share, please contact james.oneill@weld-hospice.org.uk.